Bwahaha.

'Poor thing, you must have had a rotten time,' she murmured, and by way of showing her sympathy put her hand on his shoulder.

He took it and kissed it, but she withdrew it quickly.

'Why did you do that?' she asked, with a blush.

'Have you any objection?'

She looked at him for a moment with twinkling eyes, and she smiled.

'No,' she said.

'You know, you are a ripper. I'm so grateful to you for being nice to me. I like you so much.'

'Don't be idiotic,' she said.

Philip took hold of her elbows and drew her towards him. She made no resistance, but bent forward a little, and he kissed her red lips.

'Why did you do that?' she askeed again.

'Because it's comfortable.'

She did not answer, but a tender look came into her eyes and she passed her hand softly over his hair.

'You know, it's awfully silly of you to behave like this. We were such good friends. It would be so jolly to leave it at that.'

'If you really want to appeal to my better nature,' replied Philip, 'you'll do well not to stroke my cheek while you're doing it.'

- Of Human Bondage, W. Somerset Maugham

Is it just me or is this incredibly funny? I can picture this in a Happy Madison movie.