According to my trusty Longman Dictionary of Contemporary English, forgive means to stop being angry with someone and stop blaming them, although they have done something wrong.
Okay... You clearly need to stop being angry AND blaming. What if I'm no longer angry, but I'm not sure if I've stopped blaming them? Hmmm. What does it mean to blame, anyway?
To say or think that someone or something is responsible for something bad.
There are four options here:
Say someone is responsible for something bad
Say something is responsible for something bad
Think someone is responsible for something bad
Think something is responsible for something bad
As long as one of them applies, you're blaming already.
Even if I no longer say that someone/something is responsible for something bad, I may still think it. After all, I can't change my mind to think that someone/something ISN'T responsible for something bad. That would be believing in a lie, wouldn't it?
If someone/something IS responsible for something bad, naturally that would be the right thing to think. I certainly can't think otherwise. Therefore, blaming cannot stop.
Ah I realise that this can be a little hard to figure out. Let me use a Venn diagram to illustrate what I mean.
∑ = Having done something bad. This is an assumption that must be made, because something bad has to be done in order to bestow forgiveness.
Get the diagram so far?
A = Stop being angry
B = Stop blaming
F= Forgive
We all know that A ∩ B = F. Right?
The problem is, B = ∅.
Since B = ∅, A ∩ B = ∅
∴ F = ∅
So, forgiving is a mathematical impossibility. There's simply no way about it! Forgiving does not exist! >=)
6 comments:
what if I thought that even though I think the person was responsible, I choose not to blame him/her.
would that thought overwrite the 4 options? although it includes the word "blame" again.
these sorts of things go in loops.
Lol.
I don't quite like that defination of forgiveness though. I think forgiveness is more like granting an offence allowance without feeling offened (anymore).
emtonmi: The dictionary definition's kinda dodgy, but at least it's the "standard". But of course, my argument would fail if I referred to a different dictionary.
Hmmm. To your definition; what does it mean to stop feeling offended?
Hmm... the simplest way I can put it is 'letting go'. I suppose "to stop being angry" can somewhat satisfy it too, but barely.
i suppose that's why people say forgive AND Forget. Can't forgive if you still remember the person was wrong...
soongteng: You're my primary schoolmate, aren't you?!
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