Bodybalance, SHATEC, Message of The Blues

The Bodybalance class at California Fitness was unexpectedly exhausting. I suppose I'm just not too used to contorting my body into weird positions. The highlight of the session isn't the instructor (though he has a great body), it was actually the body composition analysis I took on a whim. There was a cool-looking machine in the waiting area that was oh-so-alluring, and me being the curious cat, I went to check it out.

I was surprised that a comprehensive analysis was printed out. Let's see.

My weight is 47.6 kg, made up of:
Muscle: 33.5 kg
Fat: 11.5 kg
Bone: 2.5 kg

Which means, 24.3% of me is fat, and the norm for females is 23%. Therefore, I am fat! You wouldn't know such a tiny being like me is almost a quarter of pure fat, eh. My ideal weight is supposedly 54 kg (the machine thinks I'm too skinny; screw it), and I need to gain 6.4 kg to attain that, 0.9 kg would be fat and 5.5 kg would be muscle. Let's pretend that I don't need to gain anymore fat, and I need to reduce 5.5 kg of fat and then develop, say, 3 kg of muscle. Then I'd be about 45 kg which is all good.

Oh, my trunk and legs have quite a bit of fluid in it. Hence the tummy. And my fitness score is 74, which implies that I have good fitness. 70-79 is good.

It's highly interesting. I'd join the gym just to get reports like that. Ha.

After that was Western Dining Etiquette at SHATEC. I found the entire experience quite amusing. After the theory, we were served a four-course meal to put our newly-acquired skills to use. Our servers were also students training to be waiters and waitresses. It's like, the diners are noobs, the servers are noobs, the chefs are probably noobs as well. This is noob house, man.

There should be no reason why all of us felt a little awkward. The waitresses looked stiff and were quite pretentious, calling us Ma'am and stuff. It must be quite degrading, having to call your peers and your juniors such titles. They're like 'N' Level holders or something, so they're probably a couple of years older than us. As for the diners, not all of us were acquainted with fine dining, so some people were asking silly questions and doing stupid things. However, I'm sure there must be a common understanding between servers and diners that we're all in the same fate, really, so there's no need to be uptight.

Anyway. The instructor at SHATEC was showing off her black lace-trimmed bra because her tube dress was coming loose. She looked vaguely kinky, in severely pulled-back hair, square-rimmed glasses and a no-nonsense blazer, yet her black lacey bra was peeking out.

********

I was hooked on this game, BP Gas Mania on Miniclip. Even though I only played it for a couple of days, and didn't even finish all fifteen levels, the catchy song had certainly stuck. I ran a search for "bp gas mania song" and easily found the band, Message of The Blues, and the original song, LA.

I tried finding lyrics, but the band was too indie to have lyrics on the web. So, I wrote them myself! Here they are. You'll thank me when you've fallen for the song. It's as accurate as a non-native North American speaker can transcribe, so there may be a couple errors here and there.

In the valley and damn it’s hot
Give the caddie put down the top
With the fellows come on let’s ride
Got to be on top to the party on the west side
Cross sunset to Hollywood
Shout out to all the boys in the 'hood
All the beaches, Malibu tan
Beautiful people on the white, white sand

Bridge
And they know that they go
In a place the girls wanna take us

Chorus
Everywhere, every place that we go
Been to Dallas, been to Tokyo
All our friends and the people, they know
That we can’t wait to get back to LA

Scene-makers and deal-breakers
In Chinatown got a remedy for everything
All around’o (?) the chicks in Colorado
Do you think we should change our names

Bridge
And they know that we’ll go
In a place the girls wanna take us

Chorus
Everywhere, every place that we go
Been to Dallas been to Tokyo
All our friends and the people, they know
That we can’t wait to get back to LA

Bridge
And they know that we’ll go
In a place that girls wanna take us

Chorus
Everywhere, every place that we go
Been to Dallas, been to Tokyo
All our friends and the people, they know
That we can’t wait to get back to LA To LA
Girls girls girls…

After listening to the song for an hour or two non-stop it suddenly hit me that I'm listening to an indie band! Pigs fly!The sun rises in the west! The moon is made out of blue cheese!